September 10, 2008 by

If Yoda Preached a Sermon

9 comments

Categories: fun, What the heck was THAT?

Pastor ____, you I thank, that invited me here today, you have.

Brief my message will be today. When 900 years old you reach, preach as long, you will not. Hm? (audience laughter)

John 3:16 (paraphrase, I will) says… “For so loved the world did God, that His only son begotten He gave, that those who believeth on Him, perish should not, but everlasting life should have.”

Everlasting life–seems something I should know about, hm? (audience laughter)

But seriously…did my third movie anyone see? Watch, and you shall know that forever, not even Yoda can live. Prepared, are you, for that day? For beyond death?

The force I use. Rocks and things I can move with it. Even a spaceship once rescued I from the muck. (Did my second movie anyone see?) And yet…I know that in me this strength lies not. A mere puppet am I. And sometimes CGI. (audience laughter) So from whence cometh my strength? As on a bumper sticker once I read–“Jesus Is the Source of the Force.” (applause)

This same Jesus, your source and strength He is, whether or not recognize it you do. And yours is everlasting life also, in Him–if only believe, you will. (applause)

But a leap faith is–a decision. Not something you try. Perhaps best I can put it with this Powerpoint chart:

(applause)

So yours the choice is, my friends. Awaiting you this everlasting life is. Believe, and yours it is. But my words mark. If in this life your Savior Jesus is not–if in Him you believe not–then go to hell…you will….

Amen. (applause)

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Musician. Composer. Recovering perfectionist. Minister-in-transition. Lover of puns. Hijacker of rock song references. Questioner of the status quo. I'm not really a rebel. Just a sincere Christ-follower with a thirst for significance that gets me into trouble. My quest has taken me over the fence of institutional Christianity. Here are some of my random thoughts along the way. Read along, join in the conversation. Just be nice.

9 Responses to If Yoda Preached a Sermon

  5. Lew A

    My wife pointed out a series theological flaw in this sermon. Yoda was not in a New Hope.

    This reveals two things to me.
    1) Yoda is obviously a sham and should be removed from the pulpit.
    2) My wife is a much bigger dork than I previously realized.

    Lew

    Reply ↓
  6. Jeff McQ

    Steve,
    I regret to inform you that Yoda has cancelled all speaking engagements for the fall. However, I’d be glad to fill in for him, if you need it. Backwards I can speak too. 🙂

    KB,
    MMMmmmmmmmm….
    ::Yoda thinking aloud in his gravelly voice::

    Lew A,
    I noticed this serious error after the story was published; however, it was too late to print a retraction. I am now embarassed and ashamed at my endorsement of this obvious charlatan. Thankfully, however, he has agreed to step down for a season of oversight–see my note to Steve above. 🙂

    Reply ↓

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