May 30, 2009 by

Punk’d by the Fates


Categories: Things I Should Probably Not Be Telling You, What the heck was THAT?

A (not so) funny thing happened to me when I was delivering flowers on Wednesday.

Actually, two things, one right after another. And both were my fault–kind of.

I pulled up to a house in the country to deliver some flowers. I parked in the driveway.

I got out of the van, and closed the door.
I opened the side door, pulled out the flower arrangement, and closed the side door.
I walked up to the porch of the house.
As I knocked on the door, I heard a loud, thundering CRASH!
I looked to see where the crash came from…and there was the van, up against the garage.
It had traveled, unmanned, approximately 20 feet, and crashed into the garage door.

I have made probably thousands of flower deliveries. I have a safe and perfect driving record.
Until Wednesday.

Why, on this particular day, would I somehow forget to put the van in “Park” before exiting the vehicle?
I mean, that’s just stupid.

But even more than that…

How in the world could I leave the van in “Drive”, get out of it, close the door, open the side door, pull out flowers, and close the side door…all while the van (still in gear) did not move an inch, but rather waited until I was well away to start idling forward??

I mean–when you leave a car in “Drive” and take your foot off the brake, it should move forward…RIGHT??? If the van had started moving when I tried to get out, that would have signaled to me that I had forgotten to put the van in “Park”, and I would have corrected the situation before colliding with the garage door.

So…not only did I do something stupid…but the delayed reaction of the van prevented me from knowing I’d done something stupid until it was too late. NO FAIR.

It felt like I was being punk’d by the fates or something. (If I believed in the fates.)

Thankfully, no one was home at the time. That would have made things even more ironic. “Sorry about your garage, ma’am, but…here are your flowers!”

Also, thankfully, the shop was very gracious about it. After 30 years in business, I guess this wasn’t the only mishap they’d seen. They assured me that their insurance would fully cover the damage. And they didn’t fire me. And I heard afterward that the garage owners were gracious about it, too.

But that isn’t the end of the story. I mentioned two stupid things that happened, one right after the other, didn’t I?

*Sigh* Oh, all right.

As I got into the van and backed out of the driveway…I got the van stuck in a drainage ditch, and had to call the shop to come pull me out.

Musician. Composer. Recovering perfectionist. Minister-in-transition. Lover of puns. Hijacker of rock song references. Questioner of the status quo. I'm not really a rebel. Just a sincere Christ-follower with a thirst for significance that gets me into trouble. My quest has taken me over the fence of institutional Christianity. Here are some of my random thoughts along the way. Read along, join in the conversation. Just be nice.

6 Responses to Punk’d by the Fates

  1. Angela


    Sorry to laugh at your expense, but that’s just hilarious! Talk about a bad day!

    Hope you have a good weekend to make up for it. 🙂

  2. Amy

    Ugh! Ha ha! I’m just so glad you are okay! Indeed, I have done some fubbles (new word!) like that myself, ooohhh, most definitely. ((Smiles ))

    What a blessing the owners of the garage AND your bosses were pretty relaxed about it. THOSE were also Gifts of Grace from Papa!

    ~Amy 🙂

  3. Jeff McQ

    Laugh all you want. It’s funny. 🙂

    Yeah, I was glad the owners were good about it. Mostly I was glad they were well-covered. They are precious people and I would have hated to have put them into hardship over this.

  4. Gary Delaney


    Sorry about your bad day. But, I’m glad it turned out alright in the end.

    Yep, I have a couple of those that made me feel real stupid. And my family was in the car at the time.

    We were checking out a church in West Chester a couple of years ago. My wife asked me to turn around so that she could take a look at the church sign again.

    I turned into the parking lot of a strip shopping area and didn’t pay very close attention to the drive way. All of a sudden a heard my wife yell NOOOOOOOOOOOO!! It was too late. My car was already on top of the boulder in the flower bed. I thank God for the car full of latino men who lifted the car off of the boulder for me. They were the only ones who stopped.

    Praise God it drove o.k. after that although there was quite a bit of frame damage done.

    I say all of that to say: You’re not alone. Praise God that He even helps us through our own messes.


  5. NC Sue

    Another way of looking at it, perhaps…

    Had the van started rolling before you were up on the porch with the flowers, you might have been injured.

    Perhaps whatever “fates” which caused the garage door to say “ouch” also prevented you from saying the same thing!

  6. Heidi W

    Oh NO! That is how my mother RAN HERSELF OVER a few years ago now. She got out, but the car started moving, she fell, and it ran over her… one knee and one foot. Only a few broken toes, but months of recovery.

    I'm glad you weren't injured!


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