Life Outside the Bubble (part 2–The Difference)

In my previous post, I talked about how I used to live deep within the bubble which is the church subculture, and how God burst those bubbles in my life, and how I am now outside the bubble without losing my faith.

So if I’m still a Christian after all this…what’s the difference that leaving the bubble has made in my life?

As I reflect on where I am now, and what kind of person this process has shaped me into–especially as I grow more settled in a new palatte for my faith–here are some of the things I see that are different about my life and discipleship:

• I am more relaxed, less anal, more able to enjoy life. Mainly I think it’s because there’s an inherent pressure within the bubble to measure up to the acceptable standards of others in that environment–to keep the unwritten social rules, to keep up the super-Christian mask. With those in ministry, that pressure is multiplied. Life is not perfect outside those parameters, but there’s just a lot less baggage to carry around.
• I am more comfortable around non-believers. This is a huge thing for me, because despite that constant clarion call within the bubble to “win the lost”, I found myself only comfortable within certain circles–and there’s really no way, in my view, to influence most people with Christ’s love when it’s obvious you’re afraid of them or uncomfortable around them. When I meet new people, I no longer feel compelled to measure their behavior to determine whether they are “one of us”, nor do I feel pressured to arm-twist them into participating in my bubble experience. I’m free to love people, and let Jesus do His work through that, whatever it looks like.
• I can interact with the larger body of Christ without having to embrace the extra trappings or re-join the club. What I mean is that I can recognize and embrace the church for what she is; I’m able to discern the organism from the institution, and have meaningful relationships with other believers both inside and outside the institutions. That doesn’t mean all believers can handle me; but for those who can, it’s cool. 🙂
• I probably shouldn’t tell you this, or admit to enjoying it–but I honestly get a kick out of making some Christians squirmy. If we ever do get in a conversation about intitutional Christianity, or I get to share some of my journey, and I say something that makes them uncomfortable…I kind of enjoy it. It might sound like a guilty pleasure, but I guess why I like it is that I know when someone squirms that I’ve just violated their filters–and that is a sign that maybe they will start re-thinking some stuff they’ve taken for granted. It sort of gives me hope. (On the other hand–I do not have much patience for religious Christians who smile “knowingly” and start telling me how they agree when I know full well they didn’t really hear what I said–and that attitude, perhaps, is my greater sin.)
• I have recovered my sense of wonder and the mystery of God. This is probably my favorite thing about life outside the bubble. What most people don’t realize is that the bubble is a controlled environment, where everything seems to make sense and/or is easily explained–and that really includes God. In the bubble, most people have a mindset they are comfortable with about who God is, how He acts, and what He does. And if we could really figure God out like that, He wouldn’t really be God. Anything we can figure out, we gain ascendency over. I’ve realized that in that bubble, I had formed God in my own image. I’m so glad to find out He is much greater than I can figure out and imagine. It’s revived my faith, so that faith itself is more about learning to trust Him with my unknowns (and watch Him work miracles) and less about working some faith formula to get Him to do something on my behalf.

More to say soon…we’re not done here…