**TONGUE IN CHEEK ALERT**
Based on the discussion from yesterday’s post–and Steve’s suggestion that the word “Christianize” has become a verb–I’m thinking we should use that word more often.
“Christianize.”
What does it mean when something is Christianized? It means that we have attached a label on it that differentiates it–and insulates it–from the world. It means we Christians can trust it as safe, sterile, and untainted by the evil world we live in. (Not unlike when milk is “pasteurized” so it’s safe to drink.) So for example, when some Christian singer sings a Christian song and releases it on a Christian record label…we can buy it with peace of mind, knowing it is family-friendly and will make us feel good.
Never mind if the theology behind the Christian song is crap. Or on the other hand…never mind if it’s so preachy that no non-believer would make it halfway through the song without turning it off. And never mind if the Christian who sang it is having an affair or struggling with an addiciton. It’s been Christianized, so it passes the test. No-brainer.
By contrast…if a non-Christian sings a song that hasn’t been Christianized…it’s not safe. Never mind if the song digs deep into the soul both musically and lyrically, and speaks the truth. Never mind if some teenager listened to it and decided not to kill herself because of it. It’s not Christianized; we don’t know where that song has been. Maybe the person who wrote the song was drunk at the time, or maybe the singer is a drug addict. The song might be okay, but we just don’t know.
Okay…so what does it mean if a person is Christianized?
A Christianized person is the safest kind of person to know. A Christianized person is steeped in the sterile culture of Christianization, consuming mostly Christianized things because, again, they are safe. A Christianized person is fluent in Christianese, the accepted language of Christianization, and rattles off the lingo without a second thought, no matter who might be listening. A Christianized person is often well-sheltered from the uglier aspects of the world we live in, spending most of his/her time safe within church-based activities and fellowship during the week, and venturing into the “secular” world mainly out of necessity, out of the need to make money. (Some of the more Christianized people find jobs in the church so they don’t even have to go out into the world.)
And here’s the best part. A Christianized person will usually not burden you with the more gruesome things that might be going on in his/her life. The brokenness, the abuse, the addictions, the skeletons in that person’s closet–all of them remain safely covered under the uber-Christian veneer, so you don’t ever have to see them or talk about them or deal with them. After all…such defilements make us uncomfortable. You don’t need to worry about that with a Christianized person; you can trust that all your interactions will be safe and sterile.
And the more Christianized you are…the fewer unbelievers will harass you. Great deal, huh?
This thing Jesus did about spending time with the sinners and telling us to preach the gospel…I’m not sure He really meant it that way. After all, He was Jesus, the sinless one. He could do that without getting Himself messed up. I think He’d rather have us untainted and safe, don’t you? After all…we might fall into sin. If we go into defiled environments, we’d have to actually trust Him to keep us, rather than keep ourselves.
Thus, the inevitable conclusion: it is best to associate only with Christianized people, and to become Christianized ourselves. After all…it’s definitely the safest way to live.
Wayward Son
Musician. Composer. Recovering perfectionist. Minister-in-transition. Lover of puns. Hijacker of rock song references. Questioner of the status quo.
I'm not really a rebel. Just a sincere Christ-follower with a thirst for significance that gets me into trouble. My quest has taken me over the fence of institutional Christianity. Here are some of my random thoughts along the way. Read along, join in the conversation. Just be nice.
View all posts by Wayward Son →
Jeff,
Love this post! I couldn’t have said it more wonderfully! I love your blunt honesty, Truth, realness and humor. Everything in this is so, so true!!
Blessings,
~Amy 🙂
http://amyiswalkinginthespirit.blogspot.com
We need to find a way to Christianize some breweries and tobacco companies.
BTW, that’s a Christianized tattoo. 🙂
Does just calling something “Christian” make it so? One of my favorite t-shirts to wear to church is this one – “Another Christian T-Shirt”. See, it must be Christian, because it says so! :o)
Jeff – Ouch! Too true! You sorta illustrate that it’s not such a giant leap we make from our “Christian” coffee houses to this whole “christian” sub-culture many of us are steeped in. Pretty soon you’re going to tell me that some guy on TV is going to try to build a whole “Christian” resort and sell time shares….. no, wait a minute….
That reminds me, Steve Taylor had a song way back in the day: Guilty by association – my favorite line: “So you need a new car, let your fingers take a walk through the business guide for the “born-again” flock. You’ll be keeping all your money in the “kingdom” now, and you’ll only drink milk from a “christian” cow!”
Too true! Somehow I don’t think that’s the reason Baby Jesus was born…
Do you think the Pharisees were Mosesized?
Jeff,
Your comparison to pasteurized milk is interesting. Raw milk is actually safe to drink; it just doesn’t have very much shelf-life. The idea of sterilizing food is part and parcel of moving away from the real thing — something grown in your backyard, or by a farmer down the road — toward something that comes in a box, laced with chemicals, etc. “Christianized” people are full of preservatives, but don’t have much actual nutritional value, as far as those around them who are hungry and thirsty for the life of God is concerned.
If something is already Christianized it keeps us from having to look into it ourselves. We don’t have to worry about anything like discernment. Someone else already did the discerning for us. They called it “Christian”.
In the words of Steve Taylor:
So now I see the whole design
My church is an assembly line
The parts are there, I’m feeling fine
I want to be a clone
I’ve learned enough to stay afloat
But not so much I rock the boat
I’m glad they shoved it down my throat
I want to be a clone
Wasn’t the very point of the Incarnation was to bring God into physicality? To enflesh the Divine, to sanctify our lives here?
Do we not do damage to that idea by separating the “Christian” and the secular?
Amy,
Thanks. Glad you liked it. 🙂
Co-heir,
Hm. 🙂
A blogger I follow actually has a brewing ministry. See the link below:
http://www.walktherazor.com/2008/02/29/riverbrew-makes-the-paper/
Jim,
And only $18.99 for that white t-shirt with the little writing? What a deal. 🙂
Steve,
I’ve heard Christian cows make the best chocolate milk. You can cast out the calories before you drink it. 🙂
KB,
No. 🙂 (I don’t know, actually, I just felt like saying no.)
Maria,
Excellent take on the comparison with pasteurized milk. Thanks for chiming in.
Mark,
That thought was actually in my head when I wrote the post, but for some reason it never got verbalized. Great point.
Mork,
Alright! The second quote from Steve Taylor! (One of my faves from the ’80s)
M-I-T,
I think you’re right. I think it does damage. Which is why I’m trying to rework that sacred/secular mentality in my own life.
I tried to say “Amen” with my tongue in my cheek, but all that came out was “lum-len.”
Nicely put!
Jeff,
The word “artificial” comes to mind.
In other words. It looks good, but is devoid of life.
I think is just begins to spiral downward from there.
Sounds like the perfect recipe for ending up like a pharisee.
And, that’s just off the top of my head.
Good post, it’s definitely food for thought.
Gary