I think when I see people inside the Christian culture-bubble respond to those who are outside it, the number one emotion I see is not resentment, or even judgment (though those are certainly factors). Rather, the number one emotion, I think, is fear.
And the fear isn’t always over the same thing. For those who are close to us, when we start acting like we’re leaving the status quo behind, the fear is over things like deception. These people genuinely care about us, and don’t want us to drift away; they just see the world through a lens that no longer works for us. For others, like those in leadership, the fear is often more over the ramifications of what we’re doing. If we’re leaving the bubble, others might follow us out, and that poses a threat. That’s why “leavers” are so often ostracized and classified as dangerous influences, and why our friendships within the institutions so often terminate as soon as we leave.
But specifically, I’m pondering the first fear–the fear of the perils that might befall us. For what it is worth, the bubble for us represents a “safe zone”–a world where things make sense, a place for everything, and everything in its place–that kind of thing. Outside the bubble, there are a lot of unknowns, a lot of unpredictibles, and things don’t feel nearly so much under our control. (They never really were in our control, but at least in the bubble we feel like they are.)
But mostly I think this fear comes from the concern that somehow we will drift away from Scripture, and ultimately from God. In essence, the Christian subculture gets equated with a Biblical subculture, and to leave one means to leave the other. Plus, when we leave the bubbles behind, from all accounts it looks like we are leaving behind other things like community and accountability. Almost like we’re backsliding.
And you know something? There are some people who have fallen away. There are some who were believers who no longer consider themselves believers, who are now agnostics or atheists. There are those who have embraced alternate theologies like universalism. There are those who have left who have fallen into sin.
No one said leaving the bubble was safe. And if they did–they shouldn’t have.
But let me just point out one thing. There are people who fall into sin and heresy inside the bubble also. The Christian subculture is loaded with sinners and heretics–including people who have completely lost their faith but are just faking it for the sake of everyone else. And I’ve known plenty of people, leaders included, who could spell out their accountability systems on paper but knew how to get around them–so it wasn’t really accountability at all.
In short…everything people are afraid will happen outside the bubble, is already happening inside the bubble. So is it that leaving the bubble is really all that dangerous? Or were we in danger the whole time, and just living in blissful ignorance about it? Was the bubble really protecting us? Was it really all that safe?
It seems to me that when we rely on anything other than the person of Jesus Christ to keep us from deception, we are already primed for it. So from one perspective, people who rely on their safety zones to keep them safe are trusting in the wrong thing, and are possibly in far more peril than they even realize. Are we trusting in an omnipotent, loving, heavenly Father, or are we merely trusting in our perception of a safe environment?
My point? It never was the bubble that kept us safe. It was only Jesus–the same Jesus who is not contained by any bubble, and has never been. He didn’t call us to create safe spaces where everything makes sense all the time, and everything feels okay. He calls us to follow Him. He doesn’t always lead us into safe places; sometimes He even dares to lead us through the valley of the shadow of death. We need not fear evil in that place, however–not because we are “safe” within the pre-set parameters, but because He is with us. His presence is what protects us.
So when I speak of life outside the bubble, I don’t mean we have to walk out unprotected and vulnerable. I just think part of this process is learning where our trust should really lay. Some may encounter peril, some may be deceived. But perhaps that’s more because their trust lay in the wrong thing anyhow. There is a difference, after all, between being contained in a bubble and being anchored in truth. And being part of a Christian subculture certainly doesn’t provide assurances for the next life; real faith has to be rooted in something deeper.
And that brings me to the crux of this whole discussion, in my view. For a vast number of people I know who have found themselves off the beaten paths of the Christian subculture, there is a common thread among them: They prayed a dangerous prayer. The words might vary, but it goes something like this:
“God, there must be more. I want more.”
“I want all there is.”
“Use me however You want to.”
“I want to know the deeper things of God.”
Any of those sound familiar? Or maybe you prayed a different variation?
What these prayers boil down to is a heart-cry for something real, something authentic, in the walk of faith. A heart-cry that wants to know the Person of Christ, not just the ropes of the typical Christian life. It seems that people who pray prayers like this quite often find themselves bubble-less–and I personally think it’s the answer to those prayers. God removes those areas of false trust, and gives us the opportunity to follow Him in a very real and tangible way.
Because however we worded it–that’s exactly what we asked Him for.
It’s not safe out here. But He is good.
Wayward Son
Musician. Composer. Recovering perfectionist. Minister-in-transition. Lover of puns. Hijacker of rock song references. Questioner of the status quo.
I'm not really a rebel. Just a sincere Christ-follower with a thirst for significance that gets me into trouble. My quest has taken me over the fence of institutional Christianity. Here are some of my random thoughts along the way. Read along, join in the conversation. Just be nice.
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This series of posts is outstanding.
I agree, for many of us the road to this bubble-free existence was not trying to escape an allegiance to God, but rather a desire to better live out that allegiance. Not running away from God, but wanting to get even closer to Him. Not trying to ignore what the Bible shows us about God, but rather to actually put it into practice.
Thanks for this.
yes. exactly. Al is right – this is a really outstanding, incredible series of posts.
I am there. Right there in that fear and doubt and ugh as I've just 'come out' and am not even fully out in many ways…..yet I know in my spirit this is exactly what I prayed for and that I could never fit back in the bubble.
What I'm also feeling is brokenheartedness & loneliness too…. because a) I feel now I don't fit in anywhere – I'm stuck between all the different groups I see and b)brokenheartedness as I realize how far lost I have been the past years. I didn't realize how little faith I've had, how wrong I've been. I think understanding finally how little I know is hard. and it's even harder to think about how how much I thought I knew. Also how much I have leaned on things, people that are not HIM or His Word. Yet I feel His grace and I know that this is all part of the detox and that these feelings of remorse will lead to a more intimate relationship as I repent and turn away from what else I made important and focus back on Him.
thanks for sharing again. time for the tissue box yet again
Where's the "Like" button? I really want to click the "Like" button on this.
Thanks Pastor Jeff. Your blogs help me reflect on where I am, and remind me I'm not alone. Not that I feel alone from God; the opposite! Just nice to remember just how many of us are find God in the ordinary.
The observation I've made is that my relationship with God is (and always really has been) my responsibility! When I was first born again the catch phrase was, "God has no grandchildren". Meaning He only has sons and daughters, but somewhere along the track I feel into letting the church "do it for me". Praise Him for drawing me back, and especially for people like you who have helped define and clarify 'the way'.
Jeff,
Thanks for that timely word. Realness and authenticity are valuable things in ones spiritual life with Christ. You are so correct when you say that there are people inside the bubble who are deceived, who think that because they are in the protective bubble that all is right and o.k..
You said, "For a vast number of people I know who have found themselves off the beaten paths of the Christian subculture, there is a common thread among them: They prayed a dangerous prayer. The words might vary, but it goes something like this:
"God, there must be more. I want more."
"I want all there is."
"Use me however You want to."
"I want to know the deeper things of God."
Any of those sound familiar? Or maybe you prayed a different variation?"
Your words bring encouragement, as I look at where I find myself today.
Blessings,
Gary
Yep. Pretty much.
My prayer was (in response to a series of somethings that had happened in the church) "If this is who you really are, I want nothing more to do with you."
Then I got to find out who He really is. It's very cool and very terrifying.
Great post, Jeff.
Al, I think you're right. I think for me, especially when it comes to living out the Scriptures, I saw so much with the old system that wasn't living up to that. My journey out of the bubble was in part out of the conviction that the Bible and the way of Christ were actually more true than we were living it. It wasn't to get away from orthodoxy as much as it was to make it more real.
Randi Jo,
I've heard it said that a sure sign of maturity is when your stack of questions begins to get larger than your stack of answers. (Or maybe I made that up. Anyhow.) 🙂 It takes time because we live in a culture where we are *supposed* to have it all figured out, and when it turns out we don't, it is devastating at first. But I have grown more and more comfortable and "okay" with the stuff I don't know. And as for the aloneness, I think God redeems that as part of our journey. It is those seasons we need to embrace Him the most. Thanks for weighing in.
JimGrey,
Please click the "Like" word below. It won't do anything, but might make you feel better. 🙂 Thanks!
LIKE
Jan,
I appreciate your comment here. If the only thing we have learned is how rely on God and not have others do it for us, we have had a successful community. 🙂
Gary,
Good to hear from you again. One or two lines from your comment may spark another post this week, so I'll save a more specific reply for then.
Erin,
Early on in her journey (even before the "deconstruction" phase), my wife (a.k.a. The Wild One) said the same thing in a reaction to something bad that happened…and in fact walked away from God for a brief time. The cool thing is, God followed her. But I think it is this heart for the authentic that has brought so many of us to this place. For me, it was never a moment of "I quit if You're no better than this", but "God, what I'm seeing here CAN'T be all there is. I know You must be more than this." However it gets worded, it brings us into the real. Thanks for the kind words, sis.